The Kindness of Strangers — and Friends and Family
There is much to love about road trips. Seeing towns, cities, and landscapes for the first time; that sense of being in control of your own fate; sampling local cuisines and cocktails.
But for people like me, who think they like adventure but are actually not super-adventurous, road trips can also be stressful. The complicated logistics of lodging and meals; the constant fear of the car breaking down (a fear that hums at a high frequency when one is driving through vast stretches of desert); the almost complete reliance on your communications technology, of which you are blissfully unaware until there’s some sort of glitch or failure (the iPhone dying, a patchy WiFi connection); the loneliness of itinerancy.
I was on the road for almost three months, from early August to late October. Not all of that time was spent researching my new book project on the Civil War in the desert Southwest. Some of it was vacation (bicycling in Aspen and hiking in Telluride with my husband), some of it was R&R (a lovely two-day break in Marfa, Texas), and some of it was devoted to academic conferences. The rest of the time, however, I was driving from one place to another, stopping for a few days every now and again to do research in archives or to visit national and state historic sites. It was an exhilarating and a crazy time.
All of this was made much more enjoyable by family and friends—and one case, the family of a friend—who housed and fed me and showed me around their towns, and by strangers who did me favors for no reason, or welcomed me into their communities.
The following people (in chronological order) showed me various kindnesses, and helped me get there and back again:
Joe Beilein, Jr. Erie, Pennsylvania
Sara Sukalich and Matt Mingione Columbus, Ohio
Amy Wood Bloomington, Illinois
Brian Craig Miller and Nick Messing Wichita, Kansas
John and Lynn Fritschel Centennial, Colorado
Elise and Ken Davis Santa Fe, New Mexico
Frances Jay and Rob Regehr Santa Fe, New Mexico
Nancy Castelli Santa Fe, New Mexico
Randy Egan Santa Fe, New Mexico
Sam Truett Albuquerque, New Mexico
Virginia Scharff and Christopher Wilson Albuquerque, New Mexico
The members of the Las Cruces cycling
group who welcomed me to their ride
through the pecan groves of Mesilla
and beyond Las Cruces, New Mexico
The young man at the Radio Shack
who calmed me down and sold me a
burner phone after my iPhone died in
the middle of White Sands Missile
Range* ** Las Cruces, New Mexico
Anne and Jerry Moore Tucson, Arizona
Rebecca Cohen Tucson, Arizona
Ben Irvin Tucson, Arizona
The NPS ranger at Fort Bowie National
Historic Site, who gave me a ride back to
my car so I would not have to hike back on
the trail with a backpack loaded down with
books about Apache history Bowie, Arizona
The security guard at the main gate at UTEP,
who took pity upon me and gave me a one-day
parking pass so I would not have to drive
around for another hour, looking in vain for a
parking space El Paso, Texas
Lonn and Dedie Taylor, who welcomed a
complete stranger into their home, told me
stories about the area, and then took me
to lunch Fort Davis, Texas
Catherine Clinton San Antonio, Texas
Greg Chico Austin, Texas
Natalie Ring and Jon Daniel Dallas, Texas
Jeanne Lopiparo Memphis, Tennessee
Rebecca Conard Murfreesboro, Tennessee
Gib Backlund Murfreesboro, Tennessee
Juliet Wagner Nashville, Tennessee
Nancy, Trey, Alex, and Kate Grayson
(and Oliver) Walton, Kentucky
Dave Kieran Saratoga Springs, New York
* Don’t worry, I managed to resuscitate it
** Don’t think I’m not suspicious about this